A Warehouse Night's Dream
by lillekat
Summary: The gang become part of Shakespeare's comedy, courtesy of a tricksy artefact.


Myka ran down the stairs as fast as she could. She shouted over her shoulder.

"I'm sorry Pete but I've got Saturday off and that's that. I have plans"

Pete came stumbling after her, "Please Myka; It's the Rolling Stones - they hardly ever tour any more. This could be my last chance to se them."

"Well, you should have asked for the day off weeks ago when you found out about it. I have plans now and I'm not going to cancel for some silly pop concert."

"OK. I hadn't realised it was going to be a problem. Myka PLEASE - I'll give you 2 days in return"

Myka turned to Pete and smiled sweetly. "No." She flounced off down the corridor.

"You are SO selfish"

"Well YOU are pig headed and spoiled!"

The two of them had started into their regular argument over who was the most ill mannered and biggest spoilsport, when Artie walked in a stuck an arm between them.

"Right you two, we have a assignment - And you cannot be in the midst of an argument when you find this particular Artefact. Is that clear?

Myka immediately stated that it was absolutely clear and she had no intention of arguing, providing Pete didn't start it first. Pete in turn stuck his tongue out at Myka behind Artie's back. Artie sighed - This one was going to be difficult. Artie handed them the file.

"You're to going to Stratford upon Avon, England. The Artefact has been sighted in the small museum next to Anne Hathaway's house.

Pete immediately asked who the hell Anne Hathaway was, prompting an extra long sigh from Myka. She looked despairingly at him. Pete could see that she was about to launch into one of her explanatory speeches, so he quickly jumped in. "I'll read about it in the file, no doubt".

He took the file from Artie and flicked through it. He came across a sketch of the Artefact and laughed out loud.

"You're kidding right? Fairy wings?"

Artie sighed, "Yes," he said. "Fairy Wings. To be accurate and you know how I love to be accurate, the original wings for Oberon and Titania from the First ever performance of a Midsummer's Night Dream."

Myka looked at Artie, puzzled. "What kind of Artefacts are they?"

"According to writings of the time, " Artie began. "Shakespeare was having trouble getting the actors playing Oberon and Titania to stop bickering and concentrate on getting their scenes right. The characters weren't 'believable' enough. And so he had 2 pairs of wings constructed that, when put on, give the wearers fairy 'powers' but also the desires, wants and needs of Shakespeare's Oberon and Titania."

Artie continued, "There are also pouches of some kind of hallucinogenic powder that will make people also believe that the wing bearers re indeed the fairy king and queen and they themselves have a part to play."

He looked sternly at Pete and Myka. "Until those needs are fulfilled the wings cannot be removed and the personalities of the wearers will be altered. The wings were designed to affect arguing couples. What ever you do, do not argue, disagree or bicker when in close proximity to the wings. And do not let them get you to try them on."

Artie nodded toward the door. "Go; the pair of you. And be careful"

The two agents arrived in Stratford without incident and quickly made their way to the museum. They found the wings easily - How could they not: The two pairs or shimmering beauty were the prized possession of the museum. Pete emptied the building of staff and tourists alike whilst Myka began taking the front of the display cabinet off.

She was startled at the sumptuousness of the wings - Each pair was crafted from some kind of translucent mesh, with the veins of an insect woven through out of what looked to her like silver or gold wire. Myka couldn't see what the wings mesh was made of, but it shimmered with all the colours of the rainbow.

Myka snapped on a pair of latex gloves and picked up a pair. The wings were attached to a sort of harness that glistened as if it was wet or sticky. As soon as she had the artefact in her hands, she had a strong desire to try the harness on, just or a second, just to see. Shocked, Myka dropped the wings.

Pete walked in at the exact moment the wings fluttered to the floor. "Careful." he said, "You don't want to break them or Artie will be mad as hell!

Myka gave Pete a look which said quite clearly that she was well aware of that, thank you very much and had he been on hand to help they wouldn't have fallen. As Pete approached the case he too found that he desperately wanted to touch the wings.

"Wooo-wee!" He whistled. "They're strong aren't they?"

"Very" Myka agreed. C'mon lets get them in the bag.

They gingerly took the two pairs of wings and gently put them the in the Warehouse envelope they had brought with them. Myka looked at their efforts, uncertainly. "What's up?" Pete asked

"They don't fully fit." Myka said . "The envelope won't close."

"Oh it'll be OK," Pete was keen to get going. Musty old museums gave him the creeps.

They managed to travel back to US soil without incident and they had even made it half way back to the warehouse before Pete couldn't contain himself any longer.

"I don't see why you can't let me just look at it", he grumbled. "It's not as though it would hurt anyone."

Myka sighed. "It would hurt me," she said. "Look, I've never been able to make my father really happy, you know that. This is my last chance, before..." She left it hanging but Pete knew what she was saying. Myka's father had been diagnosed with cancer and didn't have long to live. Pete sighed. But still...

As they pulled up outside the warehouse, they hit a small stone in the road. The car jolted and the envelope slid slowly to the side of the vehicle. The shimmering wings could now be seen quite clearly poking out of the top of the envelope.

Pete was the first one out. "Please, Myka. Just tell Artie you'll sway this Saturday - Whatever your plans are I'll make them up to you.""

Myka walked to the back of the car and opened the boot. "Nope. Stop asking me Pete, I've said No and that's it."

Almost subconsciously Myka was pulling at the harnesses, easing them out of the envelope. Pete shoved her out of the way and grabbed at one of the harnesses. She gave him a push back and then slipped one of the pairs of wings on. They fitted perfectly, as if they were, well part of her. As she stared at Pete triumphantly, Myka saw that he too had a pair of the wings on and the harness itself was melting into his clothes. She looked down at herself only to see her own glossy harness slip within her.

"Oops" Myka giggled.

Pete turned to her "So is that your final word?"

"You should have planned better - I'm trying to teach you to be a better agent. Can't you see that?"

"We'll see about that," muttered Pete and with a short laugh, vanished with a little twinkly sound.

Pete materialised in the lab behind the warehouse's computer expert. Claudia spun round.

"How the hell did you get there?" she demanded, "And what the diode are you wearing!"

Pete grinned. "How now spirit" he said. His voice had a sing-song quality to it. "Now, my gentle Puck..." And with that he threw what looked to Claudia like glitter over her.

"Hey!" Claudia fell silent. She put her hands up to her ears and felt them elongate in her hands. Disconcerted her hands moved to the top of her head. Two small horns had sprouted towards the front of her skull.

Claudia giggled. Then she laughed. Then she tried a little skip followed by a jump. She ran across the room and was there in a flash. She sped back before bowing low in front of Pete.

"My Lord and King." Claudia laughed as she said the words.

Pete was looking thoughtfully out to the warehouse floor.

"I need something that's going to persuade Myka to swap days off with me. And also punish her, just a little bit for being such a prig"

"Uh huh," replied Claudia. "And what did m'lord have in mind?"

Pete smirked. "Does the warehouse have any love potions or suchlike?

Claudia grinned back at him. "Might do... Might well do..."

She went to the inventory and started running a search.

"How about a mirror that makes you fall in love with yourself?"

"Nah." mused Pete. "Not amusing enough"

"Ooh what about this?" Claudia pointed to the screen. "Eyedrops - one bottle makes you fall in love with the first living creature you see. The second removes the lust film"

"Perfect. Can you go and fetch it for me?"

"I can. And in return..."

"In return?" asked Pete.

"In return you give me a little of that fae dust stuff you have there. I might have a use for it..."

Myka had returned to Leena's B and B. As she walked up the path, wild flowers sprung in her wake, creating a scented map of where she had been. She entered the drawing room and sighed.

"I think we need to bring the woodland here" she mused. She pulled at the drawstrings of the bag at her waist and pulled out what again looked like tiny particles of glitter. She threw a handful over the large Chinese rug and watched grass and moss grow to cover, first the rug, then the floor and out the door. Myka drew in a deep breath. Already the room was starting to smell better.

Myka looked around the now lush glade. She threw some of the fairy dust into a corner and giggled as a small copse of trees began to grow up up through the ceiling and onwards up to the sky. Flower garlands entwined with ivy trailed down the trees and wove together creating a sweet scented bower. Myka nodded approvingly. This was more like it. More like home.

The front door slammed and Myka heard Leena's voice calling our urgently "Artie?! Myka?! Pete?! Have you seen what's happened to the house?"

She burst in through the door to what had been the drawing room and was now most definitely not the drawing room and saw Myka sat on a swing swaying gently in a woodland paradise.

Leena looked around the room in amazement. She stared at the corner where the Chinoiserie vase had stood. Now, a small waterfall was cascading out of a crack in the wall and had formed a pool below. Lilies, reeds and other plants were growing in and around the pool as Leena watched. Everywhere there were wild flowers growing or patches of soft grass.

She heard Myka's voice, soft and lyrical calling to her, and turned. Myka herself was looking quite different. Her usual smart suit and blouse ensemble had been swapped for what Leena could only call an Amazonian style fashioned from leather, flowers and vines.

"Leena," crooned Myka. "How lovely to see you here in my round. Have you come to sing with me?"

Leena thought quickly. Obviously , something was very wrong with Myka, and she, Leena, needed to get to Artie as soon as possible and fast, before the house and possibly Myka's mind collapse.

"Of course I have, Myka." Leena said soothingly. "Why don't you have a little rest and I'll um sing."

Myka yawned. "I am getting a little sleepy.." She settled in the flowery cradle and closed her eyes.

Leena managed two runs through Frere Jacques before she heard gentle snores coming from the bower and fled.

Pete watched Leena leave the B & B at a run and waited until she had disappeared to the warehouse. Pete had also changed his image somewhat from his usual jeans and a shirt. Now he was bare chested and wearing a long deep red robe, belted around the waist. Bare legs and feet could be seen just below the hem of the robe but the gravel of the B & B path didn't seem to bother him. He tiptoed into their home, and snuck silently into the indoor wood. He watched Myka sleeping for a few minutes before gently dropping some of the bottle he held into her eyes. Then he stroked her hair before vanishing as quietly as he had entered.

Back at the warehouse, Claudia was bored bored bored. So many ideas were rushing around her brain but Pete had told her to wait there and so she sat waiting. Artie came in from documenting some new finds.

"Oh, er Claudia" he said absent-mindedly. "Are they back yet from England?"

Claudia stared at Artie. "Perfect" she thought.

She smiled sweetly. "Yeah", she replies. "They're at the B & B getting cleaned up."

Artie looked concerned "Where are the Artefacts?"

She pointed vaguely to the balcony outside the control room "Oh, they were put away earlier"

"Really?" Artie was getting quite perplexed "So soon? Have they been catalogued?"

Claudia looked directly at Artie. And she was beginning to get a really really great idea. Oh this would just be awesomely amusing!

"Oh yeah!" said Claudia. She beckoned him over to the terminal "Look."

As Artie leaned over to look at the terminal, Claudia sprinkled him with fairy dust.

"Where?" said Artie.

"My mistake." said Claudia trying not to laugh as she watched 2 large asses ears start to grow from the top of Artie's head. His teeth were lengthening too...

"I'm going to hee get this haw straightened out." stormed Artie. "Where the hell are Pete and Myka!"

Claudia thought she could really have some fun now so she repeated "At the B & B" and watched smirking as the now transformed Artie left the warehouse. Then she sped out herself.

The sun had gone down now and a mist was rising all around the warehouse and B & B. Claudia sped ahead of Artie. She stopped suddenly a bit ahead of him and, speaking in Leena's voice called to him.

"Artie? Artie! Where are you? We need to get back to the house!"

"Leen-haw?" neighed Artie.

"Of course it is, Artie - Come on. Follow me."

Claudia capered off leading Artie to Myka's woodland whilst avoiding the real Leena who was marching to the warehouse.

When Leena burst into the warehouse control room, it was deserted. She gazed around her and her eyes fell of some interesting looking papers on Artie's desk. Puzzled, she sat down and picked up Artie's file on the Shakespearian Faeries.

Claudia cajoled and led Artie into the B and B. As soon as he approached the gate he could see that all was not well. Treetops were gently waving through the roof and it looked like the moon was shining from within the house itself.

"Leena?" called Artie. "Are you OK? Do you know what's happened?"

Claudia tried not to giggle out loud. In Leena's voice she replied "Everything's fine, Artie. But you really need to come inside and see Myka. I don't think she's well at all."

"Not well?"

Claudia stamped her foot a little impatiently. Would the silly man hurry up and get inside. She wanted to see what was going to happen when Myka woke up.

Artie finally made it through the door and stared around him in shock and wonder.

"Oh dear." he said. "Someone put the wings on didn't they?" He looked around for Leena. "Leena? Are you hee-re?"

The wood was now lit by a full round moon that seemed to be shining through the trees and yet not from outside the house. Artie peered through the bracken and caught a glimpse of the sleeping Myka. He pushed through to the small clearing and shook his head.

"Dear oh dear oh dear. This is a Fine Mess."

Myka stirred and opened her eyes. She gazed at Artie for a long moment."

"What angel wakes me from my flowery bed?"

"Don't you dare start that." said Artie firmly. "Obviously things did not go according to plan and since I haven't seen Pete I can only assume that he too is afflicted." He scratched his ears amiably.

"I'll go back to the warehouse and read up on how to get these wings off. You stay here Myka. Maybe put some clothes on?"

Myka jumped up, and threw some of the fairy dust over Artie. "Out of this wood do not desire to go" she commanded. Artie immediately turned to face Myka. He broke into a sleepy smile and bowed to Myka.

"My Lady" he declared "you are the most beautiful creature I have ever been lucky enough to see."

Myka smiled benevolently at him and beckoned him to her. Artie walked as if in a daze to Myka's bower and she took him into her arms in a warm embrace.

Myka sighed as she laid her head on Artie's chest. She truly had never felt so happy or at peace. When she saw Pete saunter into the room, her usual displeasure at seeing him melted away from happiness and she smiled at him.

"Pete," she said softly. "Are you well? Artie is resting. Isn't he gorgeous when he sleeps?"

She stroked the long furry ears in wonder and nestled closer to him.

Pete was starting to feel a little guilty about what he had done - He had certainly never expected it to be Artie that Myka fell for. In truth he was kind of hoping it would be himself.

Pete looked at Myka and asked her to swap days off next weekend. She barely looked up and nodded before lowering her head to nuzzle at the sleeping Artie's ears.

Pete produced a piece of paper, which read: I, Myka Bering, agree to swap days off and work on Saturday 15th June so that Peter Lattimer can go away. He presented it to Myka along with a rather smart looking pen. She smiled dreamily and signed her name with a flourish. Pete smiled then and leant forwards.

"You have something in your eye. here, let me..." he gently tipped Myka's head back and dropped the antidote into her eyes.

THe effect was surprisingly quick. Within seconds Myka had blinked, shook her head and jumped out of her flowery hammock away from Artie.

"What the hell happened, Pete? I thought I was dreaming."

Pete held out his arms to her. "It's over now Myka" She found herself moving easily into Pete's Arms and allowing him to comfort her.

As his arms closed about her, there was a click and the 2 sets of wings loosened. They both pulled away, and the wings fell to the floor.

Myka looked around, bewildered. The forest was vanishing in front of their eyes. Artie awoke with a start and glared at the faerie wings lying o the floor. Then he rummaged through a drawer to find an Artefact bag and scooped up the two devices. He gave Pete a very firm stare, and avoided Myka altogether. He didn't say a word. There was nothing that could be said right now. He gathered up his dignity as best he could and strode out of the B and B. He happened to pass Claudia on the way and noted that she did not look nearly as contrite as she should.

He entered the Warehouse and fully deactivated the wings. Whilst he was finalizing the file, leaving out quite a large part of the adventure, Leena found him.

"Oh thank goodness you're here. I think something's gone terribly wrong with Myka…" She looked at his face. "Ah. You know." she said. Artie sighed, nodded and returned to his filing.


End file.
